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“SILENT READING” ABANDONMENT
We have all been abandoned at some point. And when I say abandoned, I don’t just mean an extraordinary act. Traumatic. No. It’s simpler than that. But it hurts just the same. We’ve all been abandoned in the middle of a mess. At the beginning of a project. In the pleasure of an accomplishment. At the most unexpected moment. At the most anticipated moment.
Sometimes it happens that you turn around and there’s no one to wipe your nose, to pat you on the back, to wink at you when something goes well, and to clean your knees when you’ve fallen. We all know the loneliness that comes with feeling alone. Because we’ve all been abandoned at some point.
And then we find a very sad secret, a palliative act, to cover up that hole. We see people swallowing their anguish with a pack of cigarettes, another running like crazy hoping the wind in their face blows away that hole in their chest. People biting their nails along with their nerves and paralyzing anxiety. Packs of cookies that go straight into their mouths without realizing that what they’re trying to kill is not hunger. Or at least, not that kind of hunger. Kids piercing their noses and veins with something to escape to another reality for a few hours. Someone else gambling what they don’t have. You’ll compulsively buy things you don’t need to feel a bit alive for a moment. And I’ll stay watching a movie that subtly allows…
